Success is choosing between what you want now and what you want most.
A friend and fellow Beacon Buddy confided in me about her relationship struggles. At her daughter’s wedding two weeks ago, she decided she could not let the extra wedding cake go to waste. So, she brought it home, convinced she would bring it to her book club the following Monday. She found herself, Sunday night, knee deep in the wedding cake, wondering how she got there, knowing that it might be a week or twelve until she got back onto her plan.
Filled with demoralization and shame, she shared with me how badly she wants a calm, loving relationship but almost always finds herself whisked away by the lure of something a bit sexier – sometimes it’s a seemingly innocuous bite of wedding cake, sometimes it’s a juicing fad, sometimes it’s simply the relief of saying “f*ck it” and turning to Sugar. In every case, she leaves her quiet and peaceful way of eating for a quick-fix, sexier, “just this once” way. And it’s never just this once…
If you’ve struggled on the diet roller coaster, getting on and off and on and off, you know what I’m talking about when I say my dear friend is a chronic cheater. Seriously! Times get tough in a relationship and her first instinct is to cut and run into the arms of her sexy and abusive lover, Sugar.
While I was listening to my friend’s sadness, hopeless and shame, I thought how incredibly unsexy all this chronic cheating really is! Maybe it’s time we treat our relationship with food the same way that we treat our most beloved relationships. Maybe when we make an error or stray from our best selves with food, we behave the same way as when things go haywire in our relationships: talk about it, plan for it not to happen again, get some help to figure out better solutions, be kind and gentle to ourselves and our partners. You know, thinks that make relationships last.
I shared this with my happily married, amazing mother, lots of friends in her life Buddy, and light went on. I asked her to consider, as I will ask you today, Buddy, to stay the course of this relationship. See slips and transgressions as places to be curious and compassionate and make brave changes in your life, not as reason to harm yourself and make your relationships suffer. See what comes up and let me know!
And if you’re free, let’s chat more about this tonight Join me at 8:30 tonight onBeacon’s Facebook Page for our Beacon Buzz Afterparty on FB LIVE! Bring your commitments, questions, thoughts, comments, and ideas. #seeyousoon
In case you forgot: BEACON IS HERE TO HELP – with all things food and weight! We’ve got you! Get in touch to schedule a 20 minute strategy session with me. Beacon can help in all sorts of ways – including our new E-SERVICES for those of you outside the NYC metropolitan area. And always stay in touch – your Beacon team wants to know what’s up! Shoot us an email and let us know all the things!
You inspire me on the daily, Buddies. And for that I am grateful.