“I don’t think I’ve ever been to an appointment in my life where I wanted the other guy to show up.”
And just sometimes, that ‘other guy’ is us. Sometimes, it’s hard to show up for ourselves and have faith in ourselves and what we do. On some level, George Costanza had it right!
Last Sunday, I was in Florida, working on my book (spoiler alert) and had to write your Buzz on the airplane. Easy peasy, right? Got on the plane, shared my heart with you, had serous gratitude for Wi-Fi and pressed send.
When I landed and read the Buzz the draft I had sent was somehow not the draft I had written. It was filled with typos, and not the work my integrity self wanted to give you. Cue one of the most toxic feelings in the world of food and weight issues: SHAME.
Of course, I know that you are a forgiving bunch – you’re my Buddies for goodness sake! But in that moment, that is NOT what my brain was telling me. It was more like, “They’re all going to unsubscribe. What’s the matter with you! Could’t you simply have woken up where there was more reliable Wifi? You’re such a loser.” Ouch!
And you know, in the dark days of my diet drama and diet trauma, shame was THE excuse to go hard on the sugar and flour. The voice telling me that I wasn’t enough, that I was bad and wrong and should be embarrassed to be around and certainly am not good enough to write an email – it ruled the roost.
I’m older, smarter, and better practiced now – that voice isn’t AS convincing as it once was – if we can hear even a smidgen of distortion in our thinking, shame can be, as we say at Beacon, a problem to be solved.
Today’s solution comes from an old Seinfeld episode where George does the exact opposite of what he thinks he should do and his whole life gets better. And that’s what I did: When I wanted to shut down and visit the Dunkin’ Donut kiosk, I instead took a big breath (underrated skill of the year), went into the bathroom and splashed some water on my face. Cue the best use of Distress Tolerance skills! Then I texted one of of my amazing Beacon Team members and she said, “Molly! It’s perfect imperfection. It’s the real side of reality!” Which was good enough for me to move on and use it as a learning opportunity.
When we can make our mistakes little blips on the screen, and opportunities to grow, we can navigate life with so much more ease. And we can take more risks and be braver in shining our light, and that’s the whole name of the game in this little thing called life. #winwinwin
We make mistakes. We are human. It’s what makes life exciting and interesting.Making a mistake is not BEING a mistake. Refusing to take harmful actions when we make mistakes helps us to believe this with greater ease, and helps us to feel, be and shine our light. And you deserve ALL the light, Buddy.
Team Beacon is always wanting to know what’s up with you. Shoot us an email and let us know what’s up, what’s down and what we should be Buzzing about. We’re always here to help!
Speaking of help – we have SO MUCH!: Including our new E-SERVICES for those of you outside the NYC metropolitan area and we always have a free strategy session for anyone interested in Beacon to help find your path to success. Please get in touch to schedule a 20 minute strategy session with me!
Sending sooooooo much love Beacon Buddies!!!