Yesterday was our first real peek into summer here in the Northeast. After a pretty cold and grey spring, the sun came out loud and proud! With the sunshine often comes triggers for us food addicts in recovery.
First…Happy almost summer!
With summer comes beaches and pools. And with beaches and pools comes … bathing suits. And, with bathing suits comes some Beacon Buddies throwing out a serious SOS for some Buzzhelp with how to manage as food addicts in recovery, and our emotions when it comes to bathing suits.
Many of you are thinking, “Molly, I already HAVE a solution to that problem, don’t you worry. I never wear a bathing suit. Ever.” That, Buddies, I’m sorry to say, is not a solution. It’s a trap layered with a bunch of super glue to help keep you stuck in self-hate and shame. #nobueno
As food addicts in recovery, it is reasonable that you don’t feel that your body is at its most ideal right now.
And, it may take a little time for that to change. That doesn’t mean that you ought to be banishing yourself from the fun of life. We’ve made this decision to be brave and live our best lives, right? Staying out of the fun and excitement that comes with the activities where we must don a bathing suit is the opposite of helping you to SHINE BRIGHT. It’s holding you hostage from you biggest and brightest life.
No worries. Bathing suit shame and fear is, as we say at Beacon, a problem to be solved:
Tell your fear to go and jump off the deep end. Seriously. That fear of yours, that is really trying to protect you, is in fact, blocking your ability to have fun, take risks, and create the life you want. Take a deep breath and tell the fear to back off. And if that doesn’t work, let’s use one of my very favorite skills; catastrophizing. Catastrophizing simply has us ask ourselves, “What is the very worst that could happen?” And almost always, the very worst that can happen isn’t so bad and certainly isn’t enough to keep us on the sidelines of our lives.
Pay attention to how you want to feel versus what you think you see. When it comes to how you look, your eyes can play tricks on you all day. And who wants to be constantly body checking while there is fun to be had? Not us. So instead of checking to see how you look, let’s focus on something that is far more attainable: how you want to FEEL. Taking the focus off of your body and onto the experience is a win-win. First, it allows you to have a really fun, heartwarming, interesting time at the pool party or waterpark or beach day AND it disempowers that little evil voice inside of you telling you you’re not enough.
A little cheerleading goes a long way. Who is better than you? Answer: nobody. You rock. Take your awesomeness and focus it towards yourself. And I don’t mean in a lame, “You’re beautiful at any size” sort of way that can often feel very fake and invalidating. (Though if that cheerleading works for you, go on with your bad self.) Find a bit of truth about your awesomeness and run with it. Fast. One of my favorites, when I’m feeling less than stellar in my body is, “Look how far you’ve come.” or “You are doing your absolute best right now.” Showing up for yourself in these rough moments helps diffuse the noise of the bathing suit demons. #byefelicia